Pam's Faith Journey

My faith journey took a strong right turn in 1977. My husband Dick was pastoring three rural churches but felt inadequate and dissatisfied, so he had decided to go back to work for the state. We went to see our parents to break the news to them, however, things didn't go exactly as we planned.

My mom had recently started attending church with my sister and was forever talking about the Lord and getting "saved". We decided that she had gone overboard and become some sort of fanatic. Their church had just gotten a new pastor, and Mom was very excited for us to meet him and his family. Dick and I weren't too thrilled by the idea but reluctantly agreed. After all, if my mother was so intense and fanatical, what would her pastor be like?

After parking in the pastor's driveway, Dick and I looked at one another over the roof of our car. "How long do you think we’ll be here?” I asked unenthusiastically.

“Just long enough to be polite,” Dick said. I agreed. A few minutes could seem like an eternity if these people were anything like I was expecting. But they weren't!

That evening we spent about two hours with Bill and Peggy Williams. We went back the next day for a barbecue and spent six hours just talking! It was the beginning of a very special friendship, and more importantly, the beginning of our relationship with Christ.

We had so much in common, including our last names! We were the same age, our children were only one month apart, and this was their first pastorate. But there the similarities ended. They were enthused about their ministry, while we were discouraged and unfulfilled.

Their concept of God differed radically from ours. They talked about Jesus and how He was leading them as though He were right there beside them. I felt like I should be able to look over and see Him sitting on the couch! Their relationship with Jesus was so personal that Peggy consulted Him aloud when she cooked, closing her eyes and asking, "How much garlic do I add, Lord? Thank you, Jesus."

It was as though they had a running conversation with Him! "Pray at all times," (I Thess. 5:17 TEV) was a description of their lifestyle, not just a Bible verse.

Bill and Peggy shared how they had become Christians. We explained that we had grown up in the church and had always believed in God. While they accepted our answer at face value, the Holy Spirit used that conversation to prick our souls.

On the three-hour trip home, we were unusually quiet. I just couldn't get over the contrasts in our thoughts about God and ministry. Bill and Peggy loved what they were doing! Dick and I commented on how similar and yet how radically different our lives were.

I asked Dick if he had noticed the plaque above the kitchen table. Nodding his head, he said, “I memorized it! 'Christ is the Head of this house; the unseen Host of every meal; the silent Listener to every conversation.'"

That plaque summarized the difference between us and our new friends. For Bill and Peggy, Jesus was in every decision, every conversation, every aspect of their ministry and home life. He really WAS sitting on the couch beside them! For me, He was far away, a distant God in Heaven I tried to appease with good works.

The next day a Gospel singing group led worship at our church. The entire service was filled with songs of praise and challenges to commit your life to Jesus. I had heard before how Jesus died on the cross for the sins of the world, but the thought had merely flickered through my mind and never pierced by soul.

I felt the urge to go to the altar to pray, but our small son was tired and restless. I breathed a prayer asking God to quiet the baby if He wanted me to go up front. Within seconds our son fell asleep. I was able to gently lay him on the floor and walk up to the altar. As I knelt there, I became aware of Dick beside me.

That morning Dick and I joined hands and asked Jesus to come into our home, just like He was with Bill and Peggy. Though we didn't really feel any change at that moment, as soon as we arrived back at our house, we knew God had answered.

Do you remember the scene in “The Wizard of Oz” where the film goes from black and white to color? When we walked into our house, we experienced that same drastic transformation. We knew immediately that Jesus had come into our home!

That day changed us forever. Jesus opened our eyes to the material things and worldly interests that mistakenly held priority in our lives. Most importantly, He revealed our faulty beliefs and philosophies.

Though we believed in God and knew that a long time ago Jesus had lived and died, He was more like an historical figure than someone we could know today. We didn't realize that going to church every Sunday didn't make us Christians. We believed that we had to please God by doing good works, helping others, living by the ten commandments. We didn’t comprehend that we needed to believe Jesus died to forgive OUR sins, not just the sins of the world. (Romans 3:25).

At last, we understood that only by Jesus' sacrificial death on the cross are we put right with God. (Romans 5:8 TEV) What a wonderful sense of relief and thanks we felt when we learned that "it is by God's grace that we are saved . . . not the results of our own efforts." (Ephesians 2: 8-9 TEV).

Jesus is right here with us in every decision, every problem, every conversation, every day—just like we saw in Bill and Peggy’s lives! It's a promise He has made to all of us—”I will be with you always." Matthew 28:20

On a plaque above our kitchen table, and written on our hearts, are the same words we saw at the home of our friends: "Christ is the Head of this house; the unseen Host of every meal; the silent Listener to every conversation." May others see Jesus in our lives and desire a relationship with Him.